Day 1 (October 8, 2011)
Start Time: 1:01 AM PH Time
I am feeling down. It may be caused by caffeine or it might be the cause of something.
My brain is swelling like hell that I could not explain why.
My heart is pounding like there is a giant metal ball that is going to hit it.
My body is trembling and shaking like I am in a frozen room.
My emotions are like in a whirlwind that I could not decipher.
My thinking is distorted like my brain cells are dead.
My sight is blurry that I can see nothing but a white light.
My hands are moving like something is controlling it.
My feet are so tired that it won’t want to walk.
Indeed there is something wrong.
I am lonely and alone.
No one cares how I feel.
No one wants me in an intimacy level.
No one even cares if I will die or not.
People are starting to judge me.
And I let myself be judged.
Even if I know it is not true.
I didn’t even care to fight it out.
I am a hopeless man.
I tried to dream but it never came true.
I am always left in the cliff and about to fall.
And fell deeply that it takes time for me to climb back.
I am not good in writing.
I am not good in playing words.
I am an intellect but some say I am a fool.
I feel like I am a defective human being that was not able to accomplish anything.
And it is a misery that I am not able to escape.
End Time: 1:20 AM PH Time